Does Anybody Know A Person With A Mental Illness

Emma Partnow, post: 7177 wrote: I am Pleased the Subject of A Higher Power has come up;
As I Believe In A ‘Power Greater Than Myself’ (I Unfortunately used to Believe That ‘I’ Was God);
And although (like this afternoon) I was a Milemetre from Suicide (and had Forgotten Everything About Any Power Greater Than Myself); My ‘Higher Power’ put somebody in front of me who made this Action Of Suicide ‘Impossible’
(For Today);
I Still Have To Live with The Absolute Desperation Of Feelings That Led Me To The Point Of Suicide;
And Although I ‘Do’ Feel Completely Alone Right Now; with No Higher Power Looking After Me;
I Know (only from Past Experience) that ‘He’ is There; and that When The Time Is Right Things Will Become Calmer
(Usually To a Level Of Approximately 1% From Suicide – Which Is My ‘Balanced’ State Of Normality :();
I Don’t Know Why I Have To Suffer And I Don’t Know What The ‘Big Plan’ Is;
But I Continue To Have Faith; And Pray (For Others) Each Day

I suffered for two years straight watching my mom slowly die. I never thought or felt I would smile or be happy again. I questioned God but still kept the faith. I became numb. And still today haven’t fully recovered I will never recover till I hold my mom again.

But today I look back and am thankful I didn’t give up. There is a brighter day ahead no matter what you go through or how you feel now.

Alright from Red Carpet was one song that kept me going. This house track was in my head every moring and every night for a good 3 months before and during the passing of my mom.

I believe God put it there cuz it was such a comfort for me.

Right now you might not feel it or know it but it will get better. You will look back and see how better your life is and how happy you are enjoying the new day given to you. Those small moments in life is why it’s worth living.

I’m really sorry to hear that. I cannot tell you I know how you feel but whatever time God grants us in this life I believe we can make the best of it. Whatever talent you have making or mixing music that is something you are giving to others to enjoy. What good does giving up do? It just inflicts more pain to others even ppl we don’t really know but hear the news.

I encourage you to keep moving on till God calls you home. I don’t know why we suffer but I believe one day we will find out and understand.

I believe there’s a reason for all of your suffering. We can’t even imagine to comprehend what God’s mind is like, by just looking at this earth he has a plan that we can’t see now.

There is a brighter day coming for all of us. The day we meet our creator and celebrate the new life and earth he will give us. As I read and believe God will wipe all the tears from our eyes, we will party and dance like never before.

And yes I believe there will be house and trance music playing!!! I really do.

Yep. Ex-Bipolar here.

That’s right, I said Ex. Now let me qualify that. Due to the fact that I’m still dealing with a systemic infection that causes significant nervous/brain inflammation I am still a moody bastard at times, but it’s a far cry from where I was a few years ago. Plus I know that with proper management I probably only have a year or two left before that’s old news as well. My story:

diagnosed bipolar at 15 with inexplicable mood swings, depression, manic rage, etc. Mother was bipolar, grandfather was schizo, lots of mental illness on both sides of the family, so it was more or less waiting for me. So, I did what the psychiatrists wanted me to. I faithfully took all the drugs i was given for 15 years. Lithium was the most consisten drug on that list but the list was very VERY long. By the time I hit my late 20’s my psyche was wrecked (had done 3 tours of duty in psych hospitals) and my body was going right behind it (internal organs were hitting the critical point, thigns were very very bad). Fortunately for me this was my first semester in oriental medical school (full disclosure: yes I’m a doctor and though I’m not handing out medical advice on here for tricky legal reasons, I will try to be helpful and point folks in the right directions if asked) and one of my teachers happened to be exceptionally good at his job and took a special interest in me. In a few months I went from being on Cymbalta+ Depakote + Lamictal + Geodon (I think. It’s been a while) and barely being alive (I was burning up on the outside an freezing on the inside. Every day was one big psychotic break. People would get cold just standing next to me, despite living in Florida) to being off all that stuff, recovering quickly, getting my mind back, and watching my health rebound like I had never seen it do.

My whole life I’d heard the same things everyone else hears all the time. Mental illnesses are incurable. You can only manage the symptoms and you’re going to have to live with a mountain of side effects. You can basically have your life suck in a way that’s a danger to other people or you can have your life suck in a way that’s only a danger to yourself. Turns out none of that is true whatsoever. It’s just the viewpoint of a profession that is out of its depth and assumes it’s the sole arbiter of all wisdom in the universe. You’d be amazed at what’s curable and even more amazed out how pissed off you are when you start seeing it done on a fairly regular basis.

My point is this: don’t think you’re doomed to be miserable, don’t buy into the romantic notion of the shooting star artist who dies young and leaves behind a legacy of untapped potential, don’t buy into the wrongheaded idea that this is how it is and everyone’s screwed up and this misery is just your lot in life. None of that is true. When people are sick they are sick for a reason (usually a pack of reasons in my experience). We don’t see a guy with pneumonia and go “Oh that’s just Bob. Yeah, he’s kinda phlegmy, whaddya gonna do, right?” When that guy says, “I feel horrible and my temperature is through the roof and I can’t breathe” we don’t tell him to learn coping strategies and do more yoga, we say “HOLY CRAP WE GOTTA GET YOU SOME MEDICAL ATTENTION!!” The body and the mind are one unit, not two separate pieces, and when somethings wrong then somethings wrong no matter what sphere it’s in. And when something goes wrong it can be righted again. Your job then is to find someone with the skills and successful track record of dealing with folks who have had similar experiences and go to them, because I assure you they do in fact exist. If you want to PM me with where you live I might be able to aim you at someone near you or, failing that, at least get you in touch with someone who knows someone.

The point: you don’t have to live like this, there are licensed doctors from many different modalities who deal with stuff like this all the time SUCCESSFULLY out there who you’ll find to be extremely compassionate and accomodating, you just have to find them. Don’t suffer needlessly.

Yeah Kranic is right Emma, we all care about you and need you here on the forums. Also, I think this thread is great because everyone is sure to know someone or be affected by a mental illness themselves. It gives us a chance to share and know that we’re not alone, which is more than incredible to me. Great idea! Much love, Michael